I Shouldn’t Be This Pissed Off


Maybe I shouldn’t be, but I am pissed. It’s opening night of my daughter’s play (she’s a munchkin in the Wizard of Oz) and when does my husband get home? 5pm. That doesn’t sound so bad, does it? The play starts at 8:30, we need to be there at 7:30 to get a spot. All is good. But, no. No, he takes my other two children out on the boat to go tubing “for an hour.” Because I’m so sure that was really going to happen. Somehow I knew I’d be carrying chairs, blankets, food, and everything else into the outdoor theater…and I was right.

Let me recap. I’m sick. I have strep. I’m coughing like a maniac and using my rescue inhaler consistently every four hours. I get my daughter to practice on time, do her make-up, etc. then I lug all our crap to the line. Twenty-minutes later, someone taps me on the shoulder and says that they think my mother-in-law is trying to describe me to people who work there. Did she tell me she was coming? Of course not? Will anyone that works at the event know who the hell I am? No. My daughter is not the star of the show, she’s a munchkin. There are about 30 munchkins. I doubt most of the people who work there even know her name, let alone mine.

Long story short, a friend of my sister-in-law’s saw her and pointed her in my direction. So now I was not only lugged four fold-up chairs, and two large canvas bags with food and blankets, I now had my mother-in-law. My night just kept getting better. When we finally were allowed in and got set up, I sat down to relax because walking with, and holding the chairs was way more than I should have done. On one hand, during my two trips from the car with the chairs, I got a decent workout, but while trying to carry everything at once to the seats, it was painful.

My son called a few minutes after we got settled to inform me that I gave his dad only two tickets and they needed three. My answer: buy one at the door. There wasn’t much I could do about it at that point. We also had to go over what food I bought, which further annoyed me. Then when they arrived, I got another call that they forgot the tickets in the car so I needed to come up to the ticket stand and wait with the kids while the husband went back for the tickets. I swear his head is up his ass sometimes. So he gets back and gets in line to buy a ticket and realizes (DUH) that I DID hand him three tickets (Of course I did!).

Let’s just say he annoyed the crap out of me from 5pm on this evening, but once the show started it was all about my daughter in her 10 minutes on stage (LOL) with her headband with flowers sticking out of it. This was the first big show that she didn’t look scared. It’s a big deal, so of course I cried. I always cry…at everything. It was a good show. Perhaps I’m biased but I think they could have found some better singers for some of the lead roles. While Dorothy was a great actress, she wasn’t that great of a singer. She was good…but not fantastic. I guess I’m comparing it to when my daughter was in the Sound of Music. The girl who played Maria and the teens in that just blew me away. There seemed to be a lot of nepotism with this theater company though. The board members all had big roles like the Scarecrow and Lion, and there was a munchkin that drove a lot of us parents nuts.

She needed to be front and center for everything and was picked first for anything and everything…yep, she was the daughter of someone who worked there, too. My daughter isn’t the kid who cares about that stuff. She’s still really shy and not even raising her hand for special parts (I’m working on those pep talks), but I overheard a LOT of chatter from other parents about how upset their kids were. For my daughter, the whole thing was fun and truly, what more could I ask for? I am very proud of her.

And I’m also proud of me, because after wanted to disown my other two children due to their behavior yesterday, I can honestly say I enjoyed time with both of them today and they were so much better. As a parent, I guess it helps to know we all have those days. If you spend too much time reading Facebook there are so many phony people. I have people on my friend list that are posting like 10 pics a day all summer about how they are spending time with their kids. I don’t need to take a picture and put it on social media to show that I’m spending time with my kids. I read with my son for over an hour today. I didn’t put that in my status or take a picture for instagram.

I find myself just working hard on keeping it all together. I’m a mom of three living with an autoimmune disease. I don’t know what I’m going to feel like tomorrow and that makes planning things very difficult. It scares me, and it scares my kids at times. I don’t dwell on it too much because I’m well aware that things could always be worse–and I’m not one to tempt fate and have God show me how much worse it can be.

I guess my moral of the evening is that I think most of us are struggling to hold it together. On the outside everyone seems like they are doing great, but we all have those moments in the car where we are yelling at the kids, or panicking for what seems like no reason, or just grumpy because you feel like crap. Everyone has something going on and some of us hide it, others talk about it. There’s no right or wrong way, but today the phoniness of Facebook was bothering me so I figured I’d vent about it.

I’m really happy that you and your kids are tracing leaves and that you have the nicest husband ever. Mine was a jackass tonight, but my kids didn’t annoy me today so I’m still going to call that a win!



3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. tooyoungforarthritis
    Jul 28, 2014 @ 06:30:42

    Sounds like despite an irritating evening with your husband you did well to remain calm. 🙂 I read your blogs and I can’t imagine what it must be like living with this disease and having 3 children and a husband to look after, you always manage to finish the blogs on a positive which I think is pretty amazing considering your battles. 🙂


  2. Julie Ryan
    Jul 28, 2014 @ 17:45:04

    Times like these I think we really have to force ourselves to speak up for our own needs. I know I’m terrible at it at times. When my hubby wants to do something and I just need him for whatever, I hate “ruining his fun”. But, the truth is that sometimes we have to be the bad guy (or let our illness be the bad guy). You are right going tubing “for an hour” at 5pm when you have to be somewhere at 7:30 is just a really bad idea. I’d have been pissed, too.


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