Back from My Hiatus

renee

It’s been a while since I’ve written a blog. Actually, that’s not even true. It’s been a while since I’ve published a blog. I actually began writing posts on three different nights and just felt really overwhelmed with everything that was going on. Last weekend sucked. Friday my former friend whom I’ve written about in the past, really pissed me off and it was just a night full of his drama.

I wrote explaining what happened, but every time I started writing about it, I just felt like it was a soap opera and I wanted it all to be gone. Long story short, he’s been doing a lot of drinking after losing the last love of his life, and tried to suck me into his drama first by saying he wanted to kill himself, and then next by repeating something I said and posting it on Facebook, which set in motion a whole slew of issues. He loves drama and posted something about ebola on a local town page after I mentioned a conversation that I had with a local doctor (my neighbor).

Of course, he doesn’t feel like he did anything wrong, and when I didn’t see eye to eye on that he lost it. He said all sorts of crap that prompted me just to block his emails. Then he created a new email address to continue it. I’m guessing he must have gotten some kind of notification that his emails were not going through. I worked myself up a bit because I thought I was going to run into him at Nutcracker and I didn’t even want to see him. I kept my word and brought a bag of clothes for his daughter, and my youngest daughter gave them to her.

He did send a text thanking me for the clothes, and I just said no problem. As dramatic as that was, I’m glad it all happened. That makes me sound like a crazy person, but in some ways I didn’t want to get to the point where I cut him off totally, but now it’s clear that’s the way it needs to be.

The weather has been getting colder here, and my hip and lower back have been very stiff. I don’t have my follow-up appointment with the endocrinologist until November 1st, but some of my test results (the thyroid ones) came back completely fine. I’m not sure why the other results aren’t listed, but after doing a bunch more research on PCOS, I decided to buy some supplements and see if that helps at all. I went a little crazy and bought chromium, cinnamon, B complex, and co q10. I’ve only been taking them since Monday, so I don’t have anything to report on whether or not they are working.

I’m just desperate to find something to help. I feel like if I could just figure out why I’ve gained so much weight it would really help. It’s not only killing my self-esteem, but it’s also making it harder when I do exercise. I keep reading that people with PCOS are more likely to have heart disease, etc. I need to stay off of WebMD. I just want to get to my next appointment and have a plan. My biggest fear is that all my test results will be fine and there won’t be a course or plan of action.

So far this week, I’ve managed to be a huge bum. I feel slightly guilty that I hardly left my bedroom on Monday until the kids got home from school. It’s just that my weekends are so jam packed with me shuffling kids to one activity or another. I was out in the cold Saturday night for my son’s final regular season football ball game. I already knew they made the playoffs, but it was his first evening game, and though I still don’t understand football, even I knew it was a good game.

All in all, things are status quo. I’m not in terrible pain. I’m still tired all the time, but I’ve just accepted that this is the way it’s going to be.

Now let me say a few words about Renee Zellweger. I don’t have a problem with people wanting plastic surgery. Heck, if I had loads of money to spare I’d want a nose job. I’ve always looked in the mirror and just seen my nose. It’s too big for my face, but I live with it. What I don’t understand is wanting to look like a completely different person. I would never have known that was her, if they weren’t discussing it on the news.

Truth be told, she’s not a favorite of mine. She always looked like she was going to burst into tears in photos and I can’t stand the faces she’d make on the red carpet trying to look hot. That being said, I thought she was so much prettier before the surgery. She had a soft, kind quality to her that is just totally gone now. I’m not saying she’s not still pretty. She is fine, but I don’t understand to want to change everything. When does that end? I’d guess that once you start rearranging things and fixing things you don’t like, you’d likely begin to focus on another area you don’t like. Maybe go for liposuction next or a boob job?? I don’t know.

It just doesn’t make sense to me!

 

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