I’m a Bitch and Other Musings


Do you ever have those days where you just know you’re not as patient and kind as other days? Maybe you snap at people. Maybe you swear or don’t care as much about things. Well, that was my day today. It didn’t start out that way. I had a decent morning; taught my class and had a conference call with a family that I am taking on as an advocacy client.

Then I got an email from my former friend, clearly trying to reconnect after our last dramatic fight. I’m pleased to say that I didn’t engage. But then, my computer started shutting down and I realized that my battery is no longer working. So every time you touch the power cord, it shuts down…in the middle of what I’m doing. This did not make for a fun afternoon.

I haven’t gotten as much done as I needed to this week and I had to stop and edit pictures for my son’s football banquet. I sent her a message on Facebook asking if her son would be a wrestling tonight so I could give her the disk of photos. Otherwise, I said I’d drop them off at her house. She immediately wrote back on my Facebook page that she doesn’t use Facebook messenger, and “what did I want.”

So I repeated my message on the wall, to which she responded that she needed the pictures by Tuesday so she had to come up with another idea. I had a WTF moment. Seriously? You are putting them in a slide show to play at the banquet. I can easily pop them into a slide show. As a matter of fact, I’ve asked if she needed help all along, including with the banquet. She did something similar to me last year, so I should have seen it coming, but I was pissed that she wrote it like that on my wall. Of course, nosy Facebook people emailed asking if there was a problem with the pictures, so I put them all (way more than she asked for on disk) on to Shutterfly and sent them all to the team, just like I did last year so people could buy them if they liked a particular shot.

I tried to let it go, and maybe I couldn’t because I have taken my Celexa in two days and I’m exceedingly bitchy. I sent her an email later this evening saying I was sorry if I held her up with the pictures, but that I was waiting on a shot of one boy that I didn’t get a closeup of. I said I was sorry if she couldn’t do something with the pictures that she wanted, but that I was deleting her Facebook post because I had two people asking if there were issues and I don’t like that kind of drama.

She emails back, what Facebook post? You know that feeling you get when you just know someone doesn’t like you. This is her. I can honestly say overall it really doesn’t bother me because I don’t see her or have close mutual friends. We’re friendly when we see each other and that’s fine with me. It’s just that the past two season’s I’ve done everything to try and help and be nice, and she still gives me a huge attitude. People like that just piss me off, and today was just a day where I had enough crap.

I have been feeling like crap. I stopped the Metformin after puking this weekend, but then I restarted half the dose on Tuesday. I needed that time to get over the nausea. So far so good on the new dose, and I’ll probably try and move up the dose next week.

I saw my rheumatologist on Tuesday. He wants me to do a Vectra blood test for rheumatoid arthritis. Has anyone had this done? I was given a huge box to bring to the blood lab. Odd. Anyway, he’s still questioning the RA diagnosis, so he says this will give him a better idea of what’s happening. I have the joint pain, significant pain in my hands and feet, but my swelling is usually minimal. At times my hands and feet have bad swelling, but when I saw him on Tuesday they were fine. Isn’t that always the way it is? I asked if he wanted me to call and try and get an appointment when they were swollen, and that didn’t go over well.

I know damn well he can’t get me in at a whim, though he said I could try. Otherwise, he wants to see me in March. That’s not going to happen. I’ve already decided I can’t make it through this winter off meds again. I will see how the blood work comes back, and go from there. I’m ready to go back on Plaquenil.

We are getting our first touch of snow tonight and it’s very cold. It’s only supposed to be a dusting of snow to an inch…nothing major for Connecticut, but I’m just not ready. I miss the warmth. My cats and I have spent most of the week under the heated blanket. At the moment, I have my big cat on my lap, all snuggled up. He makes it hard for me to want to move.


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. fefe23
    Nov 15, 2014 @ 17:12:58

    Your doctor isn’t smart or maybe he is that ignorant


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