Another Tough Week with a Happy Ending

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Overall this has not been a great week for me. I’ve had horrific migraines, to the point where I had to pull over with my kids in the car because my vision was to blurry to drive. My stupid insurance only covers 4 generic pills (Maxalt) per month. It’s the only thing that truly helps me, and I used all four this week.

I have a feeling part of it is that they changed my birth control pill and my hormones are all over the place, but there was one point Tuesday night where I thought my head was going to explode.

In all honesty, it was a very stressful week for me. As I mentioned, we were adopting a puppy. I had asked and asked for an updated picture and when I finally got one on Sunday night, the dog looked nothing like I thought. I agonized over this. The point of me getting my midlife crisis dog was fulfill the lifelong dream of having a German Shepherd. Now I went through hell to rescue and he wasn’t a shepherd.

I sat the kids down to talk and no one was on the same page as me, as expected. They had their heart set on him. But the next day they agreed to look at pictures of German Shepherd puppies that were available this week. We all agreed that I needed to contact the rescue, allow them to keep the money as a donation, and get the dog I was dreaming about.

.I shed a lot of tears figuring out what was the best decision, and I’m sure that didn’t help my migraines. When it came down to it, the whole dream of getting one was out the window if I took a dog that really wasn’t what I wanted. But then I struggled with being a horrible person who agreed to rescue and changed her mind.

I’ve never bought a pup without meeting it, and ultimately I felt meeting a dog first was so important. So…we found pups in Pennsylvania that were 8 weeks old and ready to go to homes. We drove 4 hours one way…did I mention I have three kids?

When we” got to the farm house, my kids asked what this cart was in the yard and I had to explain before we got out of the car that they apparently were an Amish family. I hoped our little talk would help keep the comments to a minimum, but my son doesn’t always take social cues so well. The first thing he said when he saw the woman with her hair in a cap and the man with the long beard was: “Why are they dressed like that?”

Anyway, we met 9 puppies that all looked alike and it was no easy decision, but I watched one little guy go up to each of my kids and play so I chose him as our new baby. Even after 8+ hours in the car (with the last 4 in constant dispute over who was going to hold the puppy), I can tell you we made the right decision for us. He’s a lovey and I’m saying that at 2AM after he just woke me up to go outside.

He is not a big fan of his crate. He lived in a barn with cows and had never even been inside the house. I worried how my pets would react, but so far they’ve all amazed me. Our dog didn’t seem upset or dominant and the cats have slowly been checking him out. He should totally be back in the crate right now, but he’s asleep on my lap.

I love him and he was worth the week of hell. I feel like complete crap right now. My hands are swollen. My body is completely stiff from the car ride, but somehow I know it is all the way it was supposed to be. I mean, look at his picture. How could you not love him?

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Glad That Migraine Is Over

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Last night sucked. I had a horrible migraine on and off since Saturday. Yesterday was bad enough that I used one of my rationed Maxalt. Even the generic is so expensive because my insurance has a rider on migraine meds for me. I hate them for it. Just throwing that out there.

I was up until 4AM, mostly playing online Words with Friends and Dice with Friends. I’ve been doing a lot of donation requesting from companies for an online auction that the nonprofit I work for is doing in May. I don’t mind doing the requests by email, but I’m definitely not someone who will go into businesses and solicit donations in person. I hear that yields great results, though.

While the Maxalt helped for a few hours, the migraine came back in full force by last night. I had to cancel plans to go to the Capitol today for Special Education Day. It just wasn’t going to happen with blurry vision in one eye and a pounding head.

I’m doing a lot better now, but even though it’s been a long day. I hardly got out of bed until like 1:30PM. I hate when that happens, but I have to accept that there was no way of getting around it today. My body was not having it. Even though the weather is warming up to a balmy 40 degrees, my hands are still swollen  and sore in the morning. Today was just all around crap.

We have 12 more days until the puppy arrives. I can hardly stand the wait. We just want him here! He would have arrived today if they let him go on my friend’s transport, but the 28th will come soon enough.

I’m going to try to go to sleep early, despite the fact that I slept all day. I just feel like I’m fighting something and I can’t tell whether it’s the beginning of a rheumatoid or fibro flare. I often feel like I’m getting the flu when I get a flare…that almost sore throat, achy body feeling.

I hope you’re all have a better day than I am.

It’s Friday the 13th

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I should have known never to plan a birthday sleepover on Friday the 13th. Let’s just say it didn’t go well. I took 6 ten-year-olds and my younger daughter to see Cinderella in the IMAX theater. About halfway through, my daughter told me she didn’t feel well. Then she threw up on the way to the bathroom.

She didn’t want me to tell her friends until the movie was over, but in the meantime I was texting all the moms that the sleepover needed to be canceled. My poor daughter. She was crying and so worried her friends would be upset, but she has some super sweet friends. I’m praying she’s not up all night throwing up. She’s been asleep since minutes after we got home.

It’s been a long time since I’ve written a blog, and truth be told, I’ve been a bit depressed. I set my sights on getting a puppy and that took over my life for about two weeks. Adopting a rescue dog is no joke! It took over a week for us to get approved for a dog…well, the dog I wanted. The local rescues approved us quickly but they didn’t have what I was looking for.

I wanted a fluffy German Shepherd mix. I applied for a puppy in a Texas German Shepherd rescue. His pictures weren’t great, but there was just something about him. I felt like he was the one. We got the approval for him over a week after we applied. They called references, our vet, did a criminal background check.

Anyway on February 28th we found out that we were approved to adopt the puppy (pictured above) who has named Benson at the rescue. We spent the next three nights in family meetings discussing his name. No one could agree on anything. All our pets are named after foods so we wanted to keep that theme.

The kids came up with Root beer, Colby (cheese), Chip, and I liked Schnitzel. Schnitzel was immediately shot down. After days of negotiations I felt like we needed to find a new choice and I was driving by a Dunkin Donuts (if you don’t live in the northeast, it’s a huge donut and coffee chain). It hit me…Dunkin is a great name and it’s still a donut!

So they all agreed and we hoped to get him by the middle of the month. Because he had to be neutered we needs to wait a week for the transport to be scheduled. Then they said it would be March 18th. Ok, I could work with that. Then they emailed that the transport on the 18th was canceled and I lost it. I don’t want to miss the puppy stage.

Long story short, he is arriving in CT on March 28th. I wasn’t thrilled, but I can’t do anything to change it. The vet he saw in Texas pushed back his age three weeks making him ineligible for transport. I certainly don’t want to put him in a situation to get sick, but the waiting is killing me.

I’ve second guessed getting him about 100 times. I want a puppy, but I’ve never gotten a dog online. You don’t really know what he looks like or anything. I mean he looks cute in the picture, but what if he’s not what I was dreaming of?

I think focusing on the puppy has taken the true focus off what’s been bothering me. I know I’ve mentioned this before but I’m turning 43, the age that my mom was when she died. As it gets closer to March 30th, I’m falling further into a funk. It’s just a very weird feeling. I know the 30th will not be an easy day, but the fact that we will have Dunkin will help me focus on the positive.

My rheumatoid arthritis has been tough. This winter has been so cold and it’s like once my hands are that cold, nothing warms them up. I’ve woke up the last few mornings with swollen hands and what looks like a lipstick mark in different spots. The first day I saw it I tried to rub it off because it truly looks like a lipstick stain. It didn’t come off. Then the next day it was in a different spot. Today’s was large enough that it concerned my husband. He took a picture of it to show my doctor.

I am thoroughly disgusted with the way I look. I think that’s definitely adding to the depression. I look hideous and I don’t fit in anything. I am getting back to my Ideal Shape products and did well today. I definitely like the chocolate shakes better than the vanilla, which surprises me. Usually I like a vanilla shake with added fruit. This one smells like Play Dough to me, HAHA!

I am also forcing myself to exercise every day. It’s tough on the high pain days, and on those days I’ll just do abs or something small. If my hands are swollen, holding weights isn’t an option.

Once the puppy comes, I will be walking more…and hopefully by then it will be warmer.

I’ve also had some pretty horrific migraines in the past three weeks. I’m not sure what that’s about, but it has been awful. I use my prescription migraine medicine, Maxalt, so sparingly because even the generic is darn expensive (with insurance). I had to take three in the past three weeks. Usually I can fight it off with Excedrin, but these weren’t going away.

Anyway, I know that my next two weeks will be emotional and hectic. Right now my main hope is that my daughter doesn’t end up puking all night. She’s been sound asleep for a while. Praying she sleeps it off. Gosh, it’s awful when your kids are sick.

I’ll try and be better about keeping the blog up-to-date. I feel like it’s therapy for me.