So I had an argument with a friend about two weeks ago. It shouldn’t have been an argument, so I was caught off-guard. You see, my friend used the word “retard” in a text. I simply said that the word is really offensive. He said it was just a word and that he had no intention of not using it. So, I said that I respectfully asked for him to not use it around me.
It was around then that he lost his mind saying I let a word have too much power over me and I’m a snowflake. I believe I’m also a few other things. I could go back and look or maybe they’ll come to me as I write. The point is, he wouldn’t let it go. He said I should respect his right to use the word.
I said, great could you just not use it to me? Is it that important of a word to you, that you need to use it to me? Apparently, it IS that important to him. He said, “I want to use that word and you are asking me to censor my feelings.”
I stopped responding which was when he started in with calling me immature for being angry over a word and that I allow a word to have power over me. When I stop acting like a child, let him know. You get the idea. I wrote back that I respect myself enough to know when to walk away from a situation and that’s the last thing I said.
So why am I writing about it now? Honestly, it bothered me a LOT that night. Not the loss of the friendship so much. This person has drifted in and out of my life at his convenience. I wish him nothing but the best. I was upset that any person felt so strongly for their “right” to use a word that’s so hurtful to others. Like they need to use it. They have some sort of point to prove and that point was worth a friendship. It’s kind of sad, yet kind of interesting. People are odd.
Listen, I know there are racist people, prejudice people, unkind people, etc. I’m not naive. But usually, these people deny the fact that they are such things. I guess what I can say is he doesn’t pretend to be something he is not. But, I definitely don’t need to be around it.
Autoimmune Mama 
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